There once was a time when I really felt that I grew up mentally in my life. The moment that guided me to see much deeper into my fathers heart was when I got my first car. Through this one moment, I realized the heart is difficult to see and it is not as tangible as we may think. I perceived that the heart can be seen when it is understood.
During my young years in life, there was a time I asked my father for a car because everyone else had one and I felt that I deserved it. I found it unfair that every other person in my age had one while I was still being dependent on others for a ride. I complained and complained to my father asking him why he cannot get me a car. All I thought was about my perspective, my needs and my life.
After a couple of weeks of nagging, my father finally bought me a car. I was overjoyed and drove everywhere. I felt proud to get what I wanted. I was grateful, but that thankfulness was only a thankfulness that resulted from my conscience to be thankful when given something. The thankfulness wasn't from the heart, but still I had no regret for complaining and begging for a car.
However... All of this changed one day when I saw my mother text message from my father. My father wrote that he was under his desk at work in trembling and fear that we would lose our house. He told my mother that paying for my car was the most difficult decision of his life because it put him under enormous amounts of stress. However at the end of the message he wrote, "Even though it may be hard for me, seeing him [myself] driving around makes me smile. Even if we lose our house, our child's joy is why we work." At this moment I bawled and at that moment I understood my father's heart for me.
We understand our father's heart when we understand what he must go through to give us what we need. We may see it as something we deserve, but we must understand that sacrifice must come for others to receive. Our father in Heaven is our spiritual father whom we must understand. We must see His heart of suffering through all the historical events of the Bible and see how much He worked in order to give us faith. We may believe that faith is something we make and something we form, but in fact we must understand that it is a gift. God had to work until now so we can even have faith. He had to show that He is willing to suffer for 6,000 years in order for us to see His heart. But the question is... do we know His heart? If we don't then we must pray and ask God to grant us faith and lead us to the word that can open our minds and hearts to His own. I pray that we may all one day understand God's heart so we may carry out the actions of faith to help Him complete His purpose and will. May the grace we perceive push us to action! Amen!
댓글 없음:
댓글 쓰기